Durga..The Mother Godess of the Autumn season arrives...

When the Autumnal season turns the leaves to red, gold and brown..The Great Mother Goddess Ma Durga  is said to visit her earthly children with her celestial family.. 
The Goddess Durga is depicted as a beautiful lotus eyed woman , golden hued..riding on a Tiger or a Lion..she has eights hands carrying various weapons to destroy the evil enemies of the good and she also carries  a conch shell, prayer beads and has one of her hands raised in benediction. She is dressed in red, gold, green and the beautiful colors of autumn.
Sri  Ma Sarada Devi who was the spiritual mentor of thousands in India once said.." There is a great worship taking place every moment in the universe..you can hear it in the songs of the birds and see it in the blossoms of the flowers..live each moment of your life carefully".

The Goddess Durga is accompanied by her children Goddess Saraswati ( Goddess of knowledge and the fine arts ), Goddess Laxmi ( The Godess of wealth and prosperity ), Her sons Ganesha ( the God of wisdom )and Kartika (the God of Military acumen.)
Below the feet of the Lion she rides..lies the slain demon Mahishasur ( the one who rides the buffalo)..Here the Goddess is symbolically vanquishing all evil and demonic forces on earth.  She is the protector, the Mother and the sustainer of the Earth and all its creatures...her characteristics are Courage, protectiveness, generosity, love, compassion, wisdom, strength and fearlessness..amongst  a few.  Another name for her is Shakti..which means supernatural strength..She is described as being as tender as a Petal and as strong as the Thunder Bolt  of lightning..She is also known as the daughter of the Himalayas and at this time of the year..the Autumn colors , paint the mountains in her hue.. 

During the 10 days of ' Nava Ratri ' ( Oct 1 to 10, this 2016) when she is said to visit Earth..her visit is celebrated with prayers, celebrations, music, dance and poetry.
Culture and spirituality combine in her worship.
The eighth and ninth days are specially auspicious as she is said to have slain the great Demonic forces during those days. For spiritual aspirants, Fasting, meditation and special prayers and ' Homa' sacrificial offerings to the fire are performed.
The season starting from ' Navaratri ( the nine days of Durga puja ..in mid October .until Diwali in November) is also known as `Devi Paksha'..the time ruled by the Goddess...
The followers of the ancient Vedic religion worship her in her many aspects as Durga, MaKali and Ma Laxmi during this auspicious period of time.
Dasserah which falls on October 10 and 11 this year is also the dates of Thanksgiving Day in Canada  .Here the trees and forests have turned Red and yellow and brown and the air has the haunting touch of the changing seasons..While in India  People decorate their homes with ,lights and lamps and the auspicious new year is welcomes in with the offering of sweets and goodies to family, friends and community, in Canada families come together for the Thanksgiving dinner which is one of Thanks and celebration too.
 Interestingly some other old religions such as Judaism celebrate their Thanksgiving and both Rosh Hashana and the Feast of Tabernacle and  the eight day festival of lights Hanukka during the month of October/ November too.

A Temple dedicated to Sri Sarada Ma..the Ideal Mother at Pune in India

In the ancient Indian mythology of the great King Lord Rama who is considered a God incarnation who fought against the great evil Ravana it is said that Rama invoked the power and energy of the Goddess to finally defeat the terrible Demon and his forces.
That is why the 10th day Dasserah or Vijaya Dashami ( Victory) has a special significance in India. It is also the day on which the symbol of Ma Durga is symbolically immersed in water as she returns to her heavenly abode.

Reverend Swami Kripamayananda head of the Vedanta society of Toronto. Beautifully explained the symbolism as saying that when we physically immerse the picture or the idol...
"The spiritual presence of the great divine goddess does not disappear into the elements but goes deep into our hearts and souls where we must always make a place for her and feel the presence of God".
The worship of images and symbols..is the outer expression of the worship of divinity which must always be deep within each ..He also quoted the words of Sri Ramakrishna the Saint who is the inspiring force behind the Ramakrishna and Sarada Math and Missions worldwide : ""You were talking of images made of clay. There arises a
necessity for them too. These various forms used for worship have been provided to suit the needs of different men at different stages of spiritual evolution.” (Sri Ramakrishna)

In fact Sri Ramakrishna was one of the first Hindu Saints to experience not only the path of ancient Goddess worship as in the Vedas and Puranams but also the path of Christ and pure Islam amongst many others. It is because of his proclamation that Christ was as divine incarnation as true as Krishna and that all true and peaceful paths lead to the same one God.that has made his followers worldwide so open and unprejudiced in their spiritual outlook. It is because of Sri Ramakrishna's teachings and philosophies that the founding fathers of independent  India chose that India remain a secular country with freedom and respect for all faiths and religions.


During Diwali the divine Goddess is worshiped as Ma Lakshmi in most of parts of India..while in N Eastern Indian especially in Bengal..the dark night of the coming lunar month is observed as the night of Ma Kali Puja..Revered Swami Kripamayananda Head of the Vedanta society of Toronto explained why Sri Ramakrishna the Indian mystic often said that the new moon night is very auspicious to spiritual aspirants . "The new moon ( or darkest night of the lunar month) represents the darkness that sometimes overwhelms our lives..when our world becomes dark it is then that we turn inwards to God" he explained beautifully. That is why Mother Durga in her fierce and relentless form as Bhardrakali or Mahakali has been worshiped as a protector against  our enemies and all danger in bad times and in good times..since antiquity.




Right Picture of Bhavatarini MaKali who was worshiped by Sri Ramakrishna in Dakshineshwar India. This is her benign form which is worshiped by millions as a symbol of great protection.

MahaKali is the extreme symbolization of the Goddess since she is depicted as a ferocious dark hued woman with weapons..and  a garland of skulls..walking amongst the dead .below her feet lies her unconscious husband the God Shiva..who is trying to stop her dance of death and destruction. She is usually worshiped.as Bhadrakali which is  the benign form worshiped in most Ma Kali temples in India and the world over..in this form she  is more benign..Many cannot understand the symbolism of this form.
  

Mahakali symbolizes the face of God which appears to man as the force behind extreme calamities like hurricanes, tsunamis, earthquakes and volcanic eruptions..when thousands are killed..she is the face of God that rules in time of war and carnage. When galaxies collapse and Black holes devour entire solar systems..it is the hand of Mahakali  taking entire creations into a dimension beyond..darkness, death and..time  into a state that is eternal, pure and effulgent.  Taking refuge in her..her followers believe that they are protected from the horrors which wars , life and natural calamities bring..Her appearance is frightening to those who cannot see that it is finally God behind everything good and bad that happens on earth...Finally she is the fearless Mother who strikes fear in the heart of your worst enemy in times of  danger..She is the great protector against evil and demonic forces.

One then wonders if Ma Durga was to walk amongst humans as an ordinary human being what would she be like and who would she look like.?.would she be a bewitching beauty ..enticing men with her celestial outer beauty..?  Would she want to attract humans by power, riches and glitter..or  would she walk incognito ..arising the beauty, kindness, purity, spirituality and divinity in the hearts of all men and women? Maybe she would be the simplest of the simple and the humblest of the humble...The incarnations always choose the abode of the poor and the humble in heart.

Sri Ramakrishna the great spiritual mystic  of India who saw the divine truth of all religions and the presence of the divine Mother in all women worshiped his own wife Sri Sarada Devi as Shodashi the great divine Mother..she became the living symbol of inner beauty, the essence of Mother hood , kindness , tolerance and magnitude in heart and spirit. Her outer beauty was hidden from the world as her inner beauty blossomed and touched the life of millions even after her passing.. Her qualities are simplicity, depth, kindness, patience, spirituality, compassion, wisdom, inner strength, foresightedness and motherly love towards all creatures..to name a few..For further reading ( ..www.belurmath.org/srisaradadevi.htm )‎

This is a photograph of Ma Sarada Devi who is a symbol of purity, spirituality and essence of Motherly love and  kindness in every woman's heart. Further more it is said that EVERY woman/girl has the drop of the element of that Goddess divinity and the more pure and chaste and true she is the more it is projected. That is why faithfulness , spirituality and unselfishness have been emphasized in our culture . Men who dishonor women are eventually destroyed by their own actions. Women who are unchaste and destructive destroy themselves by the same principles.

During this season of Goddess worship there is something mystical in the atmosphere that no matter where we are in the world we feel that special bond and long for our own Mothers. My eldest cousin sister Meena Mukherji a much loved and respected former Sanskrit teacher of St Mary's High School in Pune and a poet and writer too, always says that " I feel such a deep bond with my Mother's soul and also the ache of separation from all the loved ones especially my husband who have passed on"..

I understand that ache..Dasserah was always the time when Bengali families would celebrate with, family,  friends, feasts and new clothes and revelery ..the bond between children and parents was more reinforced. as was of husbands and wife's. When my beloved  father passed away something passed away with him. He always took pride in seeing my beautiful, beloved Mother dressed like a queen. With his passing those days of glory passed on too..Similarly Meena didi's husband  Raja Mukherji was a complete gentleman who loved his family. To me he was an elder brother with the heart of a father. His legacy of decency and gentleness leave behind the feeling of joy in our hearts . Truly  there are many happy and loving memories in my heart of him as our eldest brother in law.
Daserah also reminds me poignantly of my last meeting with my beloved Grand father Shri J P Mukherji  in the Daserah day of  2002 it was my first visit home to India after moving to Canada in 2001. Every day of that short visit I would spend time with my Grandpa and share some precious moments with him. On that last day when I was to leave for Canada he blessed me with his words of benediction and advise to fully integrate in Canada, to never give up my core spiritual values of Vedanta and to find a Canadian man( yes his words for he had seen and loved Canada ) A man of depth and integrity who would imbibe all the true qualities of a good husband and life partner and to always be there for my beloved Mother. Almost prophetically all his last words to me came true. I often think of my beloved Grand Pa who was both spiritual guide and Grand father to me after my loving Dad passed away.
and so as those who are precious bid us goodbye..and as time goes by our expressions go inward. Sometimes my beloved husband Brian who is Canadian and who uncannily has the same generous spirit as  my Father did  says or does something that is almost the same as My father's words and actions and I am reminded that Love returns to us and is always with us ..and so we treasure and cherish those who God has blessed us with in this life and never take them for granted.

Below is a beautiful life like painting of Ma Sarada the spiritual mentor and woman saint of millions of people India. Painted by My dear friend Baishaki  who often visits the Vedanta society of Toronto. She  is a Dentist and also an artist and a devotee of Ramakrishna and Ma Sarada.

 In this painting.Ma Sarada has a far away look in her eyes as if she is thinking of all of her children far and near. This is Ma Sarada in the later more mature years of her life..when she was established as a spiritual mentor and a Mother  in every sense of the word to hundreds.                   
                                               Painting by Baishaki Toronto Canada.

God cannot be realized without Love, yes sincere Love Ma Sarada

Not only the followers of Sri Ramakrishna but also the humble villagers and foreign visitors to India turned to her for wisdom, love, understanding and guidance in their life...Ma Sarada is to millions the divine Mother who came incognito as  a simple village woman whose love , spirituality and generosity touched and continues to touch hundreds. Her message was that the  chief purpose of human life is to realize God and to be a source of joy to others

Baishaki  came to Canada as a young girl but yet remembers the love and affection of  the elderly  mother figures in her own life and her childhood days back  in Siliguri and Coochbihar in India..When homesick for her  beloved Grand Mother and aunts who all embodied that essence of love and motherhood and kindness... Baishaki found in the pictures of Ma Sarada her own Grand Mother and she painted this beautiful picture as an act of love. Here at the Vedanta society of Toronto there is a regular elderly devotee who is lovingly called Mataji ( Mother) by all. She is the Mother of a very positive minded friend named Neelam. Her elderly Mataji is  a very very simple and quiet woman of few words, but in her actions and observations she is a true Mother at heart

..and to conclude wherever we see that great manifestation of motherly love..whether it be in a Mother Teresa  or a teacher we have never forgotten..whether we see it in our own Mothers heart or in that of women who have touched our lives in a divine way that nobody else ever has that is  a reflection of the same divine Goddess who we are all a part of..
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It is said that there are noble and great men who can be described as a Father with the heart of a Mother..then that is true..whoever protects another..gives them joy and solace in their hour of need..whoever loves another unselfishly and serves others with only the thought of giving and leading them away from danger and sorrow..those noble ones are reflections of that great universal Mother Durga who is called Mary, Makali..Ma Laxmi ..or just Ma..and who mankind has turned to since time immemorial.. ..

God cannot be realized without love...yes sincere love" -- Ma Sarada

In the ashes of 9/11 remembering the beautiful people of New York...A Tribute to the people of America

September 11 ,2001, is about  the 2996 people who died in the  worst recorded terrorist act in history. It is about their families and the heroes sung and unsung who fought to rescue them,(Many of who died in the attempt) it is about a great and wonderful nation and its people who rebuilt their lives and took back their dignity from a handful of cowards who perpetuated this unthinkable crime on innocent men, women and children. Finally it is also about the awareness of the terrible power of jealousy and hatred and religious fanaticism  that caused this day of Hell ..... and it is also about those voices of peace, love and wisdom that silently sow their seeds of unity and Love and blow them unseen into the wilderness..

As a journalist I visited New York during those terrible days. My story is not about me..
My story is about the many great new Yorkers I met especially one such great soul who lived in the avenues of New York for many decades and said it as it was, He was the late  Swami Tathagathananda a reclusive Monk .whom I first met during the days following 9/11, That was 15 years ago .

Once again the story is not about me or any attempt to exalt myself by linking my name to the events or the people I met as a journalist that day. ..I just share a first hand experience of what it was in the days that followed  from the eyes of a total unknown stranger to New York that was me. As I walk down memory lane and share  the simple yet profound experiences that I had as a young women,( 15 years ago) who had then recently immigrated to Canada from India and was still carrying my Press card and identify as a journalist for the Indian Press..walking through the streets of New York, talking to strangers and standing by ground zero alone just about 36 hours after  the carnage I share the memories.
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It was not just The Journalistic "Spunk" or "Call" that drove me to cross the Canada border to US and see for myself and experience what it was like on that day and the days following 9/11. I had the encouragement of some of my Former Editors from the News papers back  in India as well as the total encouragement of  my best friend  Shweta Agarwal from our Masters in Journalism  program days back in Symbiosis University Pune /India too:" Its a once in a life time opportunity as a Journalist she said..you have it in you..Lipi Go do it..." Shweta is now in Boston a successful and well respected professional and a mother and wife. To her I owe much always. This was my story...
I had just landed in Canada on June 12 , 2001 a few months before 9/ 11 . I had left my home, my country and a career I loved as a full-fledged journalist to seek my destiny and dream in North America alone. My Mother had joined me in August to give me emotional support and be by my side for a few months until I found my footings and could stand on my own.
My only good friends/ well wishers in Canada were Swami Pramathananda Maharaj the late president of the Vedanta Society of Toronto and  Makarand  and his wife my landlords in Greater Toronto.

Swami Pramathananda Toronto

Swami Pramathanand Maharaj was a monk of a very high order , known for his courage and `Daring spirit ' his own life story as a monk posted in dangerous territories reads like a book. When I told him about my plans to visit New York as a reporter he almost jumped with excitement and said " Avashya ( sure thing) you must go there "..he phoned his brother monk Swami Tathagathanada maharaj head of the Vedanta society of New York and asked him to " look after me' when I landed there. Meanwhile Makarand called a client of his in New York and asked him to take me to wherever I needed to go..All I had to do was get on a Plane, a train or a bus and get my self out of here.

The Planes in Toronto were grounded that day and impossible to get a booking for the next 48  hours, trains were the same and finally I got on a Grey Hound bus and headed for new York at 10 pm in the night from Toronto Canada. I left my Mom with Makarand and his wife and she smiled knowingly" Don't worry" she said to Makarand "I'm her Mother and I am  not afraid of anything she does.. she has gone on very dangerous assignments in India and always came back safely...this time too she will"...This the courage and trust of my mother..greater far than I will ever be..

The US border across the Niagara falls bridge was scary...sniffer dogs and armed police officers  and an air of tension and fear almost like a war time zone.." So where are you going asked the Police officer? My gut instinct stopped me from saying I was visiting New York as a journalist..my credentials would mean nothing and they needed no more"reporters" in New York that night.. 

" Its my Uncle Swami Tathagathananda  of New York..I'm worried about him..he is old and he needs his family.." I heard myself saying in  a nervous voice..( wow where did that  come from I thought to myself ?} .." Swami Ta Ta whoo? asked the officer? He then grabbed a letter I was carrying in my hand..It was a print out of an email sent by my Grand father to me...

( yes my Grand father  J P Mukherji was highly educated and English Speaking ) The address and phone numbers of Swami T were scribbled at the back of the sheet
The email typed by my Grand Pa's  secretary had my Grand Father's words of blessing and love for me in my new life alone in Canada and prayers that one day I would find  a good life partner to share the journey with and that I should never fear but always know that God was with me..I saw the officer read the words aloud and his eyes teared up and voice softened.. He said nothing..stamped my passport and wished me a safe and happy trip.and so I was on my first journey to New York the night of September 12 ,2001.I stayed awake all night of that long long trip of over 9 hours to New York..at every major stop the Police would come into the bus and check passports and identity. Finally early in the morning the bus pulled into the Port authorities Station of Central New York just by Times Square.

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I was nervous. The " I just got off the Boat Mode" came over me..I walked over to the Public Telephone booths and searched my purse  for coins to drop in. All I could find was Canadian currency ..A Black gentleman on the next phone saw me and asked of he could help me..I saw his kind and friendly face and gave him my Canadian currency and asked if he could help me with the coins. He said" Lady don't worry " He dialed the number I needed. He spoke with my Landlords contact and got the address I was to get to and then took me to the cash exchange counter..called a cab for me, and carried my bags and told the driver where to take me. He shook my hands and told me to keep smiling and all I could say was "Thank you ..thank you "and before I got his name he had left..That was New York USA September 13th 2001 and the first person I encountered in this city and he was a blessing to me.

Makarand's contact  was an American of Indian origin who went by the name Jamie. He drove me to a small family run hotel where I checked myself in. He dropped me at the reception and said he would be back in  a few hours to take me to Ground Zero and anywhere else I needed to go. I showered changed, had breakfast and when Jamie came back we headed for downtown New York.

The streets were blockaded several blocks away from the down town core..The subway system was closed and Jamie had to park several blocks way from wherever we were . It took us almost 45 minutes to walk to a point where we could see Ground Zero clearly..Police, firemen, camera crews and special task forces surrounded the area. It was still being called a search and rescue operation and the crowds were being pushed back. The towers  had  completely fallen by now and the leaning buildings by the side of them were either being propped with steel enforcement or being readied for tear down.

The experience of being alone in New York just hours after the attack was like being part of something too huge for an ordinary human being like me to comprehend . The aftermath of 9/11 as a journalist truly humbled me. It was once more that I realized that

as reporters we are never greater than our stories or the people we write about. They make us humble..and... It is they..that are truly great.. The day we stop feeling the pain and the..heart throbs of our brethren that day my friend..we have truly died within ourselves.  Walking in the open grave of ground zero on September 13th and after , there was an eerie feeling of  loss and heart break not only for America but for all mankind . To me it seemed like this was just the beginning of things to come..We feel the vibrations and thoughts of people ..we have never met and yet who we are bound to..Ground Zero was so powerfully painful and heart breaking..that to this day..I often awaken suddenly and feel the sadness of standing across the skeleton structure of the fallen towers ..the huge gaping crater that was ground zero and..I felt as if I were alone in a forsaken world and that day I cried out for God and truth and the return of warmth and love of normal human existence again in this land which has given hope and freedom to so many millions.

I spent many hours alone and with strangers including Jamie walking along and around the zone and everything seemed so unreal that it was almost impossible to comprehend . hundreds of ambulances, fire trucks, cop cars and garbage  trucks were in action. Why Garbage trucks? I asked a shop keeper They are uploading the ashes and dirt from the site.
From where we were stood we could barely see the figures being pulled out from the rubble and being covered in sheets. It was like a war movie scene. Whatever news stories and statistics there were.. were being reported by  the biggest news networks and any information being reported over the world was via these channels. However standing there live in person and talking with people at the scene is something that can only be felt and understood by being there yourself. You get the feeling and understand how it is for the people there from a very unique  perspective.

The lanes bang opposite Ground zero were some kind of mini China town we went to a lane named Broadview avenue...Jamie and I took photographs and watched how New Yorkers picked up their life just days or hours after the attack. In the coffee shops..people sipped coffee, read their news papers, a Chinese shop owner tried to sell us T shirts with pictures of the Plane strikes on the towers. And the Slogan " 9/11 I was there in NY " .They are  being printed in the back allies of China town" he said.". I give you two for 10 dollars?" I turned away. Profit even from human tragedy ? What kind of people are we ?

The shadows of evening began to fall when Jamie dropped me off at my hotel lobby and picked me up the next morning at 9 am. He drove me to the Vedanta society of New York which is located near Central park and is in  an older, more pleasant and residential area of New York. Here life was more normal that expected with New Yorkers jogging in the park..going to work and living their lives as if nothing that terrible had happened.
 That was also my first meeting with Swami Tathagathananda maharaj the head of the Vedanta Society of New York. At that time I did not know that he was a very senior Monk of the renowned Ramakrishna Order of Monks head quartered at Kolkatta  in India and also a world renowned  monk and author of various books and held in high respect by the literary community worldwide .Plus Intellectuals and Americans and Indians ( India) from all walks of life.

Swami Tathagathananda NY.

We were told that he would meet visitors only after 10 am in the morning. Later I heard that from the early morning hours of 5 am until 9 am were spent in deep mediation and prayer in his little private shrine.
The Swami thanked Jamie for taking care of me and told me that from now on until I returned to Canada I was under his care. He gave Jamie some treats and slapped his back in a hearty grand fatherly way and then he took my hands like a loving father and said now " Ma"  ( term of endearment fathers use for their daughters )tell me what are you doing here alone in this part of the world.? I grinned and told him a lot of things..He listened attentively  and said.." All this reporter ..shiporter stuff is good but find yourself a good man..having love and  a family is more important than any work or name you will ever make for yourself..Love endures ..it is the only thing that matters..don't deny yourself a family and a man just to pursue ambitions....but yes you have  a story to tell and lets see what we can do.'  He said.

He picked up the phone and called the Indian Consul General in New York '' I am sending you my special reporter from India " he said.."give her all the news you have".

Then Swami checked my appearance. I was in jeans and  a casual shirt.."fair enough he said.."comb your hair nicely ..where are your socks? I told him they were wet and dirty from stepping in the puddles at ground zero. He opened his cupboard and pulled out a pair of new socks and made  we wear them. " Want to look good for the Embassy guys" he said..I grinned in reply. .I was still not aware of the greatness and awe in which this monk was held by so many.here. He sat by me simple and funny..like a cute grand father who I would love to protect. Unknown to me was that even as we met he was researching and writing books on the lives of Einstein and Gandhi that became master pieces of research and study of the mind and hearts of some of the greatest  human characters  who lived in the last century .Any google search on the Amazon Book Store  will show the vast range of books he has written  from  " Healthy Values of Living" to:
" Fear Not Be Strong" that have been hailed by thinkers and leaders from all walks of life..
He has spoken at Americas leading Universities and academies, hailed as one of the greatest authors and thinkers of his time within the Ramakrishna Mission and Vedanta societies world wide and above of all for those of us who knew him whether briefly or for long..he had the intense loving heart and mind of a true father...and yes he was such a spiritual giant..
Swami Tathagathananda Maharaj hailed a cab for me and he himself accompanied me to the Indian Consulate which is near Madison Avenue. We had audience with the Consul general and his secretary who gave us the news of 9/11 and its relevance to India.
Thousands of people of  Indian origin live and work in New York at any given time. Wikipedia describes Indian Americans or Indo-Americans as Americans whose ancestry belongs to any of the many ethnic groups of the Republic of India. They are the most socio-economically successful minority ethnic group in the U.S., The Indian Embassy phone lines had been zapped up with calls from anxious parents and spouses back in India about their loved ones. We learn here that one of the first people who died when the first plane hit the first tower was a Indian named M Singh from Manipur who was on the 110 th floor that day. The Indian government had opened special emergency call centers to handle all overseas calls and were also ready to pay for all DNA testing of those Indians who feared that their loved ones were lost in the tragedy but could not be found. Finally and above all India considers itself  a good friend and ally of America and promised the people of USA that day that it condemned this horrific act of terrorism and would stand by the Americans people against the enemies of USA in everyway. That was the breaking story with relevance to India.

When I returned to the Vedanta society NY,Swami T would not let me leave without sharing with me his dinner..gave me some of his books as a gift to my Mother and discussed with me how he thought the article should be written.I asked him for his thoughts on this and he said " The Towers will be built again one day..but what will be harder to build is the moral and spiritual fabric of any society that is falling apart."..He spoke about his spiritual ideal Sri Ramakrishna who had lived a life and shown the path of respect and truth in all peaceful spiritual paths leading to one God and slammed fundamentalism as the greatest evil of the day. Jealousy plays a great role in religious fundamentalism and it was jealousy and hate that drove the planes controlled by the terrorists into the towers He said. "Wherever you see hatred for people of other faiths under the garb of loyalty and 'Love" to one. You are seeing fundamentalism/ jealousy the root of all  this evil. It comes from moral and spiritual failure. Fanatics do not know God at all. Who gives anyone the right to say that their religion is the only truth and everyone else is a non believer/ kafir/pagan following false Gods..who..? This carnage is the result of such thinking and has to stop.
It is those who do not know God at all who condemn the beliefs of others. When you lose your spiritual and moral values even in daily life you lose everything" he said.
( The news report was carried by the Sunday Spectrum India and a  few more news papers , but as I said that this is not a story about me and my journalistic report but about the Swami and other wonderful people I met during my stay.)

A smiling American girl who is a devotee of Ramakrishna walked me to the subway in New York that night after  I bade Swami Tathagathananda Maharaj a warm and loving goodbye, As I left he told me to " Keep writing. Writing is the way we writers express what is in our hearts. Child  you are never going to win the Noble Prize for Literature so relax and freely express your thoughts. You have much to share " ( The Swamis words literally).

Next morning I reached Toronto which is so much like New York but so much younger so much newer. An almost similar though smaller down town core. Great sky scrapers and our very own CN Tower, The Lake Ontario water front and safe and beautiful subway system and clean and green city made me realize how blessed we are in Canada. I prayed that jealousy and fanaticism would not touch Canada or US or my beloved India and  anywhere in the world again. But I was so wrong..

Down Town Toronto Canada.

I met Swami Tathagathannada maharaj a few more times when he came to Canada as a honored guest of the Vedanta society of Toronto to speak at over the years.The first few visits were very happy and affectionate reunions. He would sit with all the devotees who hung around the Vedanta center in the weekends and join them in singing patriotic Bengali songs and Rabindra Sangeet in the library and tell us stories and parables. .The last time I saw him was in the summer of May 2009. Unfortunately it was a sad and bitter last meeting..Some jealous devotees led by one  old enough to be of an Uncle instigated the revered old Swami against me in an unfair manner in front of a room full of scores of people. He caught the Swami in a moment when he was tired and upset needed a break, The elderly Swami scolded me bitterly and un-relentlessly while the complainer laughed a loud and ugly laugh and was joined by many others. My Mother was visiting too at that time and the next day she was to fly back to India . She too felt the pain and sadness of that last encounter with the revered Swami and a deep sense of sadness and confusion as to why   such jealousy and anger could exist in a sacred place of worship which both she and I deeply revere till this day. . The aggressive  man a prominent devotee who I will never name was driven by insane jealousy and hate  which he had transmitted to others  for various reasons and when I look back I think it was my "karmic " way of understanding in  a very small way what enmity is and what America faced during 9/11 from her enemies and how they work.

This person who accused me was once someone I respected and considered an  Uncle figure since he has grown up children of my generation. He  had heard a few stories about my  family and our long standing connection as devotees with the spiritual organization we were all affiliated to. This is  because he hailed from the same city back in India and I was naïve and I often spoke about my time as a young girl and then later as a reporter and recounted some of my wild adventures to people at the Vedanta center Toronto many of who were my friends and fellow immigrants. I spoke  about  the great people I was blessed to have met  through the years including my first meeting with Swami Tathagathananda maharaj in New York during the week of 9/11 . I would share the stories with  him and others in a spirit of camaraderie..Little did I expect that inside him and  a few others  was concealed such spite and anger  and In an act of jealousy that would approach each one of those monks or individuals I knew in Canada and India  and then try to cultivate a relationship with them and finally try to turn them against me. With Swami Tathagathannada Maharaj and a few others they succeeded momentarily. The " Uncle used his age when suitable to complain about not being given attention and " respect". At other times he hung around with people half his age and tried to act silly.I learnt later that this elderly devotee had even acquired the telephone number of my Mother and family in India and had begun  to call my home with out my knowledge so dangerous and deceptive was his nature.Jealousy has no name, no age, no relationship.  In the world outside the realm of temples and church gates people call a spade a spade. Anybody especially mature men or women who display obsessive behavior of any kind are simply termed as `psychos or creeps.' and that's a fact.In a temple a spiritual explanation is given for every  kind of craziness. When I spoke about him to the authorities at the center I was usually brushed away and asked to forgive..to feel sorry ..but sometimes .It is impossible.
...America was attacked by people who lived and studied on her soil, enjoyed her freedom and prosperity and way of life and then attacked from within. The US is often condemned for not forgiving but going after its enemies and I totally empathies with that. Sometimes forgiveness is weakness and when the enemy is venomous like the 9/11 terrorists ..it should be a fight to the finish. It is symbolic that Swami Tathagathananda Maharaj and I met in New York during 9/11 and we had  a relationship of so much love and understanding like father and daughter . Though I was in his company for only one day and met him only a few more times in Canada it was so significant that till this day I feel a bond of special affection for him.  Yet a person who was a self styled leader of  a group driven by un reasonable jealousy made my last meeting with the Swami one of tears and bitterness . The years passed the Swami was growing old and did not return to Canada and I did not visit New York since then though I have been to many other cities in the US..

Swami Tathagathananda passed away on June 23rd 2016. A  few weeks after Swami Tathagathananda maharj passed away I had a vivid dream of him and then read the news of his passing on social media..When I heard the news I cried bitterly and shared with Swami Kripamayananda Maharaj of Toronto  my pain and sadness. He assured me that Swami Tathagahananda had still loved me always and that the scolding of Holy Men and women are blessings and they protect us in ways unseen. To me all I could do was send a silent prayer and thought of Love to the beloved Swami Tathagathanda maharaj.

This 9/11seemed like a fitting time to pay my respects to him and all the great people of USA.

 ...and the lesson I learnt is to never flaunt or speak of anything precious again to anyone except those closest and dearest to us and most trusted. The US often flaunted its wealth and blessings and invited the jealousy of the world.The other lesson is that familiarity breeds contempt.

That is why I  try to protect the sanctity of my home and marriage to a wonderful man  named Brian who is noble and precious in everyway  I keep him away from all those who have destructive tendencies and have seen my vulnerability in the past and I will always strive to keep my marriage and life with him  as private and sacred as possible. Each one of us has the right to protect our family and relationships from predators.  To me my family is a A Most precious Gem and gift from God. It was Swami Tatagathananda Maharaj who first prayed deeply and sincerely that I would one day meet a fine man and he would be my husband and my beloved Mother blessed our union.

So is our relationship with all those who are special and precious in our lives..whether it be parents or brothers and sisters and children., or spiritual Pole stars..

".

However a note about those who are men and women of God. They come for a spiritually higher purpose. They belong to No one and to everyone...It is our destiny, karma or good actions that bring us into their company. Having a feeling of possessiveness about them is futile because like the sun drop they belong to the world and not to a few individuals. In temples, churches  and places of worship we often see power centric groups or individuals trying to control or over protect a spiritual head. These people often drive others away with their jealousy and possessiveness. That is how religion and religious places become corrupted..by power in the hand of selfish individuals. Hate and not love become the central experience of these places.it was religious fanatics who committed the act of terrorism in 9/11 and that is the result of hate being preached and practiced in a religious place.Hate  gives rise to more hate..and so it goes on.

.For immigrants and expatriates..Temples, Mosques, Churches and places of worship become the central meeting points where we network with other members of our community, seek spiritual and emotional comfort and share a feeling of homecoming. When that bond is broken or no longer holds a pull we disband and disperse and seek our " Peace " else where. Some of us integrate faster into the main stream culture of our chosen land and without losing our own  identity take what is best of East and West and some of us find true Love in our chosen land and we become truly International citizens.Some become loners..but that's another story..However the ideal situation is when we can still keep our bonds  to that Mother ship of spiritual and emotional strength which we first sought..but that does not happen always..

Finally I end with the positive memory of the trip back from New York to Toronto after covering the events surrounding 9/11. That night.at a Coffee shop in Syracuse I heard the old classic song sung by the iconic American Super Star Elvis Presley.. "To Dream the Impossible Dream

Elvis personified the all American Dream and spirit that was both loved and envied by the world..he was extremely handsome, charismatic, talented, powerful and a little known fact loved his God..in fact in his last few performances he sang about his Faith in Christ. The song To Dream the Impossible Dream often plays in my mind and heart and my husband Brian plays it for me... To all the great people who passed away on 9/11 and were the targets of terrorists anywhere and everywhere..who can never be crushed by a few cowards and can still fight a just a fight and to all who loved and continue to love and finally to the wonderful people of new York I met 15 years ago especially Swami Tathagathananda Maharaj this song is surely about the indomitable spirit in you....

To dream the impossible dream
To fight the unbeatable foe
To bear the unbearable sorrow
To run where the brave dare not go

To right  the un rightable wrong
To try when your arms are too weary
The reach the unreachable star

That is my dream..

This is my quest, to follow that star
No matter how hopeless,
No matter how far
To fight for the right
Whithout question or pause
To be willing to march into hell
For a heavenly cause

And I know if I'll only be true
To this glorious quest
That my heart will be peaceful and calm
When I'm laid to my rest

And the world would be better for this
That one man scorned and covered with scars
Still strove with his last ounce of courage
To reach the unreachable star .....